i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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