He is such a slut. More and more my type.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
