i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
It's just like the Real World with babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize