Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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