my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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