i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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