oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize