I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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