Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
