your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
