They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
