Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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