Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
