You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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