I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Randomize