I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
