idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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