OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Randomize