Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize