I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize