ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i just had sex bonerless
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize