Girls should come with a carfax report
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize
