I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
