we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
