she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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