ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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