Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
