I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
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