i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
