plz talk dirty to me
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
