I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
