She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
