how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
