Hey man sorry I got all grabby
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
We had to coat check the pizza.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
