i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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