it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
