Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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