i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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