Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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