New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I just forgot I was standing up.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
