Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
