thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
