I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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