There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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