just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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