i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
