i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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