PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
