we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize