whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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